What It Really Means to Be an Influential Nonprofit Leader

Influence is the most important skill a nonprofit leader can develop—and yet, it’s the one most of us were never taught.

When people hear the word influence, they often think of persuasion, pressure, or charisma. But in the nonprofit world, influence means something very different. It’s the art of enrolling people you have no authority over—donors, board members, volunteers, partners—into your vision, not because they have to help, but because they choose to.

And that distinction changes everything.

After decades of working with nonprofit leaders as a consultant, strategist, and coach, I’ve seen this pattern over and over again: organizations don’t struggle because they lack passion, intelligence, or even good strategy. They struggle because leaders are exhausted from pushing, convincing, and managing outcomes that were never fully in their control to begin with.

Influence is what replaces that exhaustion with ease.

Influence Isn’t About Control—It’s About Sovereignty

Many nonprofit leaders unknowingly give their power away every day. We let external results dictate how we feel about ourselves.

If donors give, we feel successful.
If the board shows up, we feel confident.
If people don’t respond, we feel discouraged, stuck, or even unworthy.

That emotional rollercoaster is not leadership—it’s survival.

An influential leader operates from a completely different place. Instead of outsourcing their self-worth to outcomes, they cultivate what I call sovereignty. They remain grounded and self-directed no matter what happens around them.

When you’re sovereign, no one gets to decide whether you’re a “good fundraiser” or a “strong leader” except you. A donor’s no doesn’t mean rejection—it simply means it wasn’t the right fit for them. That subtle shift alone can transform how you show up in every conversation.

And here’s the surprising part: when you stop chasing validation, people respond more positively. Calm confidence is magnetic.

Why Knowing Yourself Is the Foundation of Influence

The first step to becoming an influential leader has nothing to do with tactics, scripts, or strategies. It starts with knowing yourself.

Nonprofit leaders are generous by nature, which often means we put everyone else first. We train our teams, serve our communities, and support our boards—while saving ourselves for last. But influence doesn’t work that way.

People will never rise beyond the level of leadership you model.

When you raise your internal standards—how you think, how you regulate your emotions, how you hold yourself—others naturally rise with you. You don’t have to announce it. You don’t have to force it. The same words you said yesterday suddenly land differently today because you are different.

Influential leaders understand how their thoughts and feelings shape their decisions, communication, and energy. That self-awareness makes them better navigators of conflict, stronger communicators, and far less drained by difficult conversations.

You Don’t Need to Push—You Need to Enroll

Somewhere along the way, nonprofit leadership picked up the belief that we have to push, convince, sell, or even beg people to care. But the harder you push, the more power you give away.

Influence works in the opposite direction.

An influential leader asks clearly for what they want without being attached to the outcome. They’re able to do this because they can navigate the discomfort of rejection, uncertainty, or disappointment without collapsing.

As I often say: if you can feel anything, you can do anything.

That emotional flexibility allows leaders to show up with openness rather than pressure—and that’s what invites people in. When donors, board members, or partners feel invited instead of managed, they choose to engage more deeply.

Everyone Has a Natural Way of Being Influential

One of the biggest myths about influence is that it looks the same for everyone. It doesn’t.

Some people influence through presence. Others through words. Some through warmth, others through clarity or vision. The problem isn’t that nonprofit leaders lack influence—it’s that many have learned to hide or minimize their natural strengths.

Often, that started early in life. Messages like “don’t be too much,” “don’t speak up,” or “stay small” don’t disappear when we become leaders. They show up in board meetings, donor conversations, and strategic decisions.

Influence begins when you honor how you naturally lead and allow that to be visible. When you do, others feel permission to bring their full selves too—and that’s how people become genuinely enrolled in your mission.

Influence Creates Ease, Not More Work

Leaders who cultivate influence experience tangible shifts across their organizations. Conversations feel lighter. Relationships strengthen. Conflicts don’t disappear, but they’re easier to navigate and don’t linger.

I’ve seen leaders raise more money without burnout, engage boards more deeply, attract stronger partnerships, and even be recognized as credible voices in their communities—all without pushing harder.

One client put it perfectly when she said this work felt like “getting a whole new operating system.” Because that’s what influence really is: an internal upgrade that changes how everything else functions.

When you show up grounded, confident, and unattached to outcomes, people respond differently. They trust you. They follow you. They want to be part of what you’re building.

The World Needs Influential Nonprofit Leaders

We don’t need more command-and-control leadership. We don’t need more pressure or urgency fueled by fear. What we need—especially in the nonprofit sector—are leaders who are calm, confident, emotionally intelligent, and deeply connected to their values.

Influential leaders don’t criticize; they coach.
They don’t diminish others; they elevate them.
They don’t force change; they create conditions where change feels possible.

And the truth is, that kind of leadership is already inside you.

Ready to Uplevel Your Influence?

If you’re sensing that you’re doing well—but you know there’s another level available to you—that’s not an accident. That’s your influence asking to be unlocked.

If you’d like support developing your influence as a nonprofit leader—whether that’s with fundraising, board engagement, leadership confidence, or enrolling others into your vision—I’d love to talk with you.

You are already influential.
My work is simply to help you access it—consistently, confidently, and with ease.